Novena Prayer to St. Monica

Novena Prayer to Saint Monica

Dear St. Monica,
troubled wife and mother,
many sorrows pierced your heart during your lifetime.
Yet, you never despaired or lost faith.
With confidence, persistence, and profound faith,
you prayed daily for the conversion
of your beloved husband, Patricius,
and your beloved son, Augustine;
your prayers were answered.
Grant me that same fortitude, patience,
and trust in the Lord.
Intercede for me, dear St. Monica,
that God may favorably hear my plea for

(Mention your intention here.)

and grant me the grace to accept His Will in all things,
through Jesus Christ, our Lord,
in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, forever and ever.

Amen.

St. Monica is the patron saint of abuse victims; alcoholics; alcoholism; difficult marriages; disappointing children; homemakers; housewives; married women; mothers; victims of adultery; victims of unfaithfulness; victims of verbal abuse; widows; wives

The Seven Sorrows of Mary

This lent I have decided to read about the seven sorrows of Mary. I feel this is what God is leading me to focus on this lent season. It has been a difficult season for me so maybe this will help me to focus on the suffering Mary went through. I also have a CD called Praying the seven sorrows with the blessed Virgin Mary that I will also be praying. I picked this up at the Catholic Women's conference in San Antonio last fall.  Amazing conference with over 2,000 Catholic women there. Can't wait for this years conference. Praying I learn more about Mary's suffering during lent and to learn to rejoice in my own sufferings.

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to us. Romans 5:3-5

Oceans

Lately I have been feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. It seems sometimes in life every which way you turn the ocean waves are just knocking you down. I live near the beach and I have been in the ocean when the waves are coming at you so fast and they are so strong that by the time you stand up you are knocked down again. And you get so worn out that finally you just give up and say I'm done! That is how it has been for me for a while now. It seems by the time I catch by breath there is another wave thrown at me. I feel like Peter when he walked on the water then he started to look at the storm around him and he began to sink. 
Matthew 14:28-33 "Peter answered him, ‘Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.’ 29 He said, ‘Come.’ So Peter got out of the boat, started walking on the water, and came towards Jesus. 30 But when he noticed the strong wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’ 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, ‘You of little faith, why did you doubt?’ 32 When they got into the boat, the wind ceased. 33 And those in the boat worshipped him, saying, ‘Truly you are the Son of God."
In this season in my life it has been me asking God where are you? Where are you in this? Can't you see the waves all around me? So this morning on the way to mass I heard this song Oceans by Hillsong. And it stuck a cord within me. Sometimes the only way for me to put my eyes back on Jesus is listening to worship music. And Hillsong is one of my favorites. 

Be Still

I read this prayer today. "Teach me, Lord, to still my soul before you. Help me to bear patiently the trials I face, and to leave everything to you to direct and provide. I know that you will always remain faithful. God’s whisper of comfort can quiet the noise of our trials." I need comfort today. And I need to learn to "Be Still" more. It is hard when you are in the midst of a trial. So this is something that I need to be reminded of today. Today is one of those days. So I am here writing this morning to get some of this off my chest. And I am trying to enjoy my wonderful Hawaiian coffee this morning. Coffee makes everything better!

Ever since I became catholic it has been one trial after the other for me. My entire family is protestant. So my conversion was a difficult one. I have been going through these trials ever since I stepped foot in the door of the Catholic Church, which was in June 2008. I have paid dearly to be Catholic with my emotions and tears. I take things to heart and when things are said regarding my faith, which means so much to me it hurts so much. And the stress that has come along with my conversion has taken its toll on me physically as well. I have had deep moments of depression through all of this. Just really dark moments where I felt I could see no light at all. I just feel like dying inside at times. And that is the worst feeling. I don't think I would have made if it were not for the grace that God has given me. And also a lot of prayer and fasting. I would not have made through some trials without prayer and fasting. 
I often wonder why God chose me to be Catholic. I am the only Catholic that I know of in my whole family. I was raised in the Bible belt in Arkansas. My entire family was raised Baptist. My great grandfather was a circuit preacher and rode his horse from town to town to preach at churches.

 My grandparents in stilled my Baptist faith in me along with my Mom. Honestly I had never even heard of the Catholic Church growing up. I just thought there were only protestant churches. So I ask myself why God would choose me to be Catholic out of my entire protestant family. Maybe He knew the true longing of my heart to be with Jesus. I always wanted to be near God. Even as child I wanted to be in church as a child and as a teenager. Every time the doors were open I was there. I don't know maybe God had this all planned out for me to be Catholic. I remember as a teenager getting this crucifix necklace that I believe my parents bought me. I wore that crucifix all the time. It was the only crucifix I ever had and I still have it till this day. So maybe that was just a little sign for me then of what God was going to do with me.

I do get a little envious of people who were raised Catholic all their lives. And there whole family is Catholic and maybe don't have the trials I go through just to keep my faith. I feel like they are so blessed not to go through what I have to endure. But I suppose there is a reason God has done this with me. 

I love my faith and I won't give it up for anyone no matter what I have to go through. But there are times when I just feel tired of the constant trials. I just want to practice my faith in peace. And this seems to be the most difficult thing.

I love quotes. And I read this yesterday....

"You can come out of the furnace of trouble two ways: if you let it consume you, you come out a cinder; but there is a kind of metal which refuses to be consumed, and comes out a star."

I am praying I come out as a Star.....